My maternity leave is officially over in a weeks time. I am going back to work full time and I will miss my beautiful daughter terribly.
But do you know what? I am actually a bit excited about it too.
Don’t get me wrong, the idea of not seeing my little girls face all day and getting to cuddle her whenever I want makes me incredibly sad, but I am looking at the positives of the situation. I believe she will thrive in a nursery environment and her development will benefit. I will be honest, I am learning how to be a Mom but I am not sure I am cut out to be a teacher too and I’m not creative enough to keep thinking of fun things to do!
And on the other hand, I like my job. I worked hard to get to the position I am in and I am good at what I do. Yes for the next 3 years or so the majority of my wages will be spent on nursery fees but when the time comes for Lara to go to school, although I can’t actually see into the future, fingers crossed I will be extremely grateful I still have my job, be earning money and in a position that I can provide what she needs comfortably.
But it’s to be hard to adjust!!
Will I still be talking through everything I am doing and asking questions which would only ever be met with a random collection of sounds in return? ‘Shall we reply to this email?’, ‘oooo let’s start on next months marketing budget shall we?’ Will I randomly start singing twinkle twinkle at my desk? Will I start rocking back and forth rhythmically whilst standing talking to a colleague?
How long will it last and how long will it take to come to terms with the fact I haven’t given my daughter a (mostly unwelcome) kiss on the cheek in hours?
Anyway like I said I am looking at the positives. I can eat my lunch in peace will its still warm. Similarly I can drink a cuppa in peace while its hot. And fingers crossed I wont have ‘row row row your boat’ or ‘wind the bobbin up’ on constant loop in my head!